HE'S BACK T^T

my God,..

The boy dat already broke my heart is back into my life now.

what a nightmare. The thing is i still love him *stupidly* but, u must know dat he's a jerk. Last years, there were so many bad news about him.

i've heard dat he steal sumthing from market, smoking and also offered a ciggarate to a small children, and there's one more news dat really hurts 4 me which i can't tell it in this blog.

but, i really can't understand why am i still feels happy when i know dat he's back and looking for me.??

my friend told me so many things about him. She said dat this boy willing to do anything for me (i'm not really sure about that). but when she said that he climbed his roof for only for asking information bout me, i dunno y it feels like very touching. i never feel like dat b4, and i never think that anyone could do things like dat for me :(

honestly, from all of de man (not much lah, few only) that show their love to me, only him that does de sweetest thing 4 me. he is not show it from words, but he show it from his action, which is so different with the other man in my life.

BUT that was just de past.,.

NOW, i only hear stories bout him. the stories dat makes me feel the 'love' again. BUT, in de end it hurts me so bad, the fact is so different wif the story. My friend said dat he's still hoping and try to get the love back from me but in the reality, he NEVER SHOW UP!! i never see him. gimana caranya gw tau klo pengorbanan dia selama ini bneran?? sedangkan gw ngga pernah ngeliat dengan mata gw sendiri..

in third problem, i dunno who;s the one to blame. is it him = for not being gentle as a man. or my friend = if she tell the 'fake stories' about him..

why all of dis happen to me? for de second time, my heart torn into pieces. gw ngerasa kyak dbawa terbang tinggi dan langsung dijatuhin pas udah nyampe atas. sakiit bgt!!

if this boy wants to hurts my feeling, all i can say is YOU HAVE SUCCESSFULLY DO IT, BOY!! CONGRATULATIONS..

new class, new situation, but why they change the English Teacher?!

wuahhh, I'm in grade XII already..
being the oldest student in the school, would not be easy..
hehe, we must face UAN next year. [scared lah]

but, there's bothering my mind..
the first day of school, i was crying bcoz i really miss vecione..
the class I'm in now is VERY different with [V]C1..
XII IPA 3 is very quiet, and i think they all are smart people who doesn't like to joking around wif their surrounding!! :(

even though I've got class like dat, i still can try to enjoyed it.
i set my mind like " it's okay, bout the class. no need to worry, this is just the beginning. and you'll still have a great teacher to teach you"
i keep thinking bout that on the first day of school..

BUT, the bad news come..
the second day, there's one of my friend (from the other class) said to me that..
the English teacher's change, Mr.Arif didn't teach grade XII..
i feel really sad when i hear that..
i just feel dat dis is too much..
I've got a class like dat, and my favourite teacher didn't teach me in the last year of school..
for 1 last year, i dunno lah. maybe i will turn ro be a quiet girl..

huhu, miss vecione so bad..
there's no one will 'bully' me like Ardhan and adit.
there's no one who have an innocent face like ical.
i still remember the time in Bandung..
when i was crying dat time, and all of my friends in vecione trying hard to entertain me and makes me stop crying..
huhu, i will not forget bout you guys..

and the last.,..
i think i'm gonna miss my fav teacher..
besides his way of teaching, i also miss the time when he tell story bout his life, his advice that encourage me to be an optimistic person (thank you so much sir), and the last i will miss the time when he was teaching in XI IPA 1..
:(

no matter what class you in/teach now friend/sir..
i hope the situation in grade XI didn't change..
you will always be my favourite class and teacher..
hehehe :)

BEST CLASS TUTOR : Bu Ida Sri Handayani :)

dun want to feel disappointed again :(

hmmfh..

my mom said dat our family will spending time in BANDUNG next Saturday..

BUT, kyaknya gw ga bkal bisa ketemuan ma abang gw..

should i feel happy or what?!

knapa sih kyaknya gw ma abang gw ngga jodoh bgt buat ketemuan??

wanna cry rite now..

this are the moments where both of us can't meet,

pdahal waktu ma tempatnya mndukung bgt :

1. pas abang gw nginep di Thamrin, gw dah nyoba buat mikirin cara ksana, dan pas gw ketemu (hari terakhir dia di jakarta), ternyata dia harus pulang lebih awal dsaat gw masih ada di skul.

2. pas gw ngelayat sodara gw ( jadi sedihh T.T ) di Bandung. harusnya abang gw dateng, coz sodara gw yg mninggal itu sodara dari nyokap. sayangnya abang gw dsuruh jagain rumah. And gw baru tau pas gw telp dia n gw dah ada di Bandung.

3. another moment pas gw ke bandung, ngikut kka gw yang mau tes di ITB. momen yg bkin gw sakiit hati BGT, coz hotel yg gw tempatin letaknya deket bgt sama humz dia. Tapi 4 some reason ( which i can't tell in dis blog), gw ga bisa ketemu dia.

hal yg bikin gw sedih, sebelum gw dateng mlm2 ke bandung, siangnya abang gw dah main and jalan2 ma kka gw. gosh, jujur gw sempet iri bgt ma kka gw! N gw juga smpet kecewa krna dia ngga ke penginapan pas gw ma bokap dah nyampe.

4. setelah Altan disunat, keluarga dia dateng ke rumah gw buat ngejenguk. and, for once again he couldn't come bcoz dat day was he's graduation's day.

will next saturday be the fifth one??

mksud : akankah no 5 bkalan keiisi ma hari sabtu besok..

jujur, gw ngga mau itu sampe yang ke 5.

Itu bkalan mnyakitkan buat gw, karna sbelum nyokap bilang ttg itu..

abang gw dah ngerencanain mau nnton, jalan2, and foto bareng sama sodara2 yang lain pas gw dateng ke bandung liburan ini...

T.T

it's been a while i didn't write in dis blog :D

hmmm, there's a lot of event that happen since i didn't write dis blog..

wat ya..

well the first is my 17th birthday..

i celebrate it in school, wif my friends and Mrs. Situmorang :P

eventhough it is not a BIG PARTY but i really enjoy it..

unfortunately, i still have one regret in my birthday..

you know wat..

i didn't give my birthday cake to the person i admire aka my crush..

my god, i thought he didn't want the cake..

but the fact is different from wat i thought..

Pow, i'm so sorry, honestly i REALY want give u the cake..

but i was afraid dat u did not like it..

hmmfh, why can't we be a good friend like in elementary school??

miss that moment so much :(

and the 2nd is..

i had a fight mith my brother..

and dis is the worst of all..

we almost not contact each other for 1 week..

gosh, i was so frustrated that time.

but luckily we already act like usual..

:)

haha, dats all lah..

to tired to write..

maybe next time,

i will write more interesting and unforgetable moment in my life..

hahaha..