Your Face, Your Attendance, Your Atitude is hurting me RiL..!!

it started when my brother gives comment in my quiz..

the quiz is bout "how's your mate looks like?"

my brother comment: "WOW, this is exactly how's ariel looks like, your friend in your toution SSC"

the bad thing is, i just added him the day before that comment appear..

and he accept the request 2hours AFTER the comment had been published..

i dunno whether he's using phone or web. but i guess he read dat comment already..

how can I say dat? hmm, i just know from his reaction after that incident.

and you know wat, he's changed!! it hurts so bad..

the first changes..

T : ril, do you want to copy this modul like the others??

A: hmm, later on may be *flat face* (usually he answers like "ok lah, as long it's not bothering you")

T: r u sure?? hmm coz i wanna copy dis modul for the others too..

A: hmm, ok then *still with no expression*

the second changes..

it happened yesterday..

while i waited for my friends to start the class in the lobby, he came..

when he passed me, he dun say any words, not even look at me..

gosh, do i looks very disgusting in his eyes??

the third changes..

usually he like to join my class after consule with the other teacher..

but yesterday, after he had finish consulting, he did not join mya class..

he went back home..

hmmmffh, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?!

is this bcoz you know dat i have a crush on you boy?!

don't you know dat your attitude is hurting me??

i want you to be the same like before..

eventhough there's no place for me in your heart, at least i'm exist in your life ril..

as a close friend maybe, or just a friend..

but not a stranger for you.. (like rite now)

Plis dun change :'(

ShouLD i feel Happy, Sad or Wat?! :(

I dunno wat should i do now..

happy like princess meet her prince..

or crying bcoz thinking dat her prince is too perfect for her??

God, i can't get wat u mean by the incident dat happen tonight..

thank you so much dat U gives the opportunity for me to join his ride..

I really really happy tonight, it's like a miracle for me :)

well, this is de story bout that special moment (for me)..

this incident start when i finish my toution in SSC..

well, there are only 3 peolpe dat entering class today..

me, Ariel and Aziz..

i'm the one who leave dat building first coz i have to catch 'angkot'..

ariel and aziz ride their motorcycle..

while i had walked for a few minutes, aziz passed me by..

he said "hey Tiara, i'm going home yah!!"

and i replied "oh, okok :) "

no longer after dat, Ariel came and passed me..

He did not said anything, did not look at me either..

aih, YOU ARE SO MEAN lah!! <<>

I really fed up with his attitude that time..

then, i continue walking..

HEH?? i was so SHOCK when i saw ariel is in front of me..

i saw him open his bag and searching for something..

so, when i passed him, i ask him..

T: hayo, apa yg ketinggalan??

A: engga, ga ada kok. oh iya, lo pulang naik apa?

T: pake angkot. tuh angkotnya (mbil nunjuk angkot di seberang)

A: hmm, mank alamat lo dimana?

T: In cikunir, jl. jakarta. tau ngga??

A: itu dimana yah? yaudah, ayo bareng aja..

T: serius? ngga ngerepotin?

A: engga kok.

T: okok, tpi gw nebeng mpe bank mandiri aja yah :)

A: bank mandiri ptung kuda 1 kan? ok...

then on the motorcycle..

Oh My God. I dunno wat should i do now..

it just like a dream for me. really, it's a miracle..

Thanks God..!! (hal yg gw pikirin pas di motor)

finally we arrived in the bank Mandiri..

T : Makasih yah, ril :D

A: iya, sama2..

T: sory ngerepotin.

A: iya gpp kok..

can't forget his face lahh >.<

but there sumthing dat makes me sad..

that happen when my mom said "jangan cerita2 ke banyak tmen kamu yah, nanti kamu malah diketawain, bgitu duank pke crita2."

gosh. after that i lost de spirit..

banyak yg lgsung kpikiran di otak gw..

" gw lebay bgt ga sih?? dianterin githu aja senengnya setengah mati!!"

"Ti, lo tuh PD BGT klo sampe mikir ariel punya perasaan yang sama kyak lo!!"

"hey, itu tuh bukan apa2. itu hal yang biasa. sumpah lo lebay abis!"

ahhh, i feel so frustrated lahh..

so many questions in my mind dat makes me feel down, down and down..

and all i do is crying when thinking bout dat incident..

but i'm still happy bcoz of ariel :)

huah, so sad T.T

you know what.??

guess, i'm the loneliest person in my sorrounding now..

huhuhu my friend dat i wrote in de blog b4, just got a new boyfriend..

i wonder what's wrong wif me?? am i freak? nerd? or what??

why can't i have a boyfriend like ma other friends?? (so desperate lah)

before i write dis blog, i was listening to aaron carter song..

the title is i'm all about you...

i dunno why i cried when i listening to dat song..

so touching lah..

(i wonder there's sum1 who will sing dat song for me) *TOO MUCH DREAMING*

huahh,,

so sad lah!!!

i think the girl dat aaron sings for is very lucky lah,,

coz aaron sings 'MENJIWAI BGTT'!! so swit lahh >.< *JEALOUS*

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NnipXd6tyJw

HE'S BACK T^T

my God,..

The boy dat already broke my heart is back into my life now.

what a nightmare. The thing is i still love him *stupidly* but, u must know dat he's a jerk. Last years, there were so many bad news about him.

i've heard dat he steal sumthing from market, smoking and also offered a ciggarate to a small children, and there's one more news dat really hurts 4 me which i can't tell it in this blog.

but, i really can't understand why am i still feels happy when i know dat he's back and looking for me.??

my friend told me so many things about him. She said dat this boy willing to do anything for me (i'm not really sure about that). but when she said that he climbed his roof for only for asking information bout me, i dunno y it feels like very touching. i never feel like dat b4, and i never think that anyone could do things like dat for me :(

honestly, from all of de man (not much lah, few only) that show their love to me, only him that does de sweetest thing 4 me. he is not show it from words, but he show it from his action, which is so different with the other man in my life.

BUT that was just de past.,.

NOW, i only hear stories bout him. the stories dat makes me feel the 'love' again. BUT, in de end it hurts me so bad, the fact is so different wif the story. My friend said dat he's still hoping and try to get the love back from me but in the reality, he NEVER SHOW UP!! i never see him. gimana caranya gw tau klo pengorbanan dia selama ini bneran?? sedangkan gw ngga pernah ngeliat dengan mata gw sendiri..

in third problem, i dunno who;s the one to blame. is it him = for not being gentle as a man. or my friend = if she tell the 'fake stories' about him..

why all of dis happen to me? for de second time, my heart torn into pieces. gw ngerasa kyak dbawa terbang tinggi dan langsung dijatuhin pas udah nyampe atas. sakiit bgt!!

if this boy wants to hurts my feeling, all i can say is YOU HAVE SUCCESSFULLY DO IT, BOY!! CONGRATULATIONS..